In Back in the USSR's first ever Halloween episode, we focus on some of the truly horrifying aspects of the world in which we live in and conclude that Freddy Krueger, Jason, Cujo, and every other character featured in modern horror films/literature is pretty tame in comparison to the CIA, the American Empire, and the global capitalist system in general. As Karl Marx said in volume one of Capital: "If money comes into the world with a congenital blood-stain on one cheek", then "capital comes dripping from head to toe, from every pore, with blood and dirt".